Monday, August 25, 2008

The First of 1st Days...

Well today marks the first of many... first days of school. Whew, it only took 4 and half years to get here. Looking back, this day felt like forever away from my life. Today got here so fast. Seems like I should still be getting Jaxon ready for our afternoon snuggle time with books before a nice long nap, instead of dropping him off and heading home for an afternoon by myself. I don't know who was more nervous...me or him! I love having my children home with me and I am so blessed to be there sole care-giver during the day here in the comfort of our home. While heading off to preschool is a great thing, it is also a little hard for me to let go. I am excited for Jaxon to learn new things, meet new people, gain some independence, develop some new skills, and have fun in a new environment. But as I am learning in life... most great things come with a little bit of hard part to it. This transition in our life is a wonderful time and new opportunity to learn together as parent and child... but it also is the ending of one chapter as we begin a new one. And thats a little sad to me.
I noticed there were mostly two types of moms dropping their children off today at preschool... there were the ones almost gitty with glee as they led their children to the door and I even heard one mention she is headed out to go shopping by herself while her little one is gone...and there were the moms who held their child's hand tightly and walked slowly to the door wondering if they really had to leave after their child went inside. Both moms gave big hugs and smiles as they let their child go and you would never know if one of them was just losing it inside... but, as these two types of moms drove away...one drove confidently into the road and onto the next thing and the other type of mom wasn't sure if she should be driving at all since she could barely see through all the tears. You can guess which one I was? :)
The drive home was sad and the first hour after I laid Austin down was too quiet and weird. However, I filled my time with baking cookies for an after school treat and thinking of all the great things we've done the last 4 years...my son and I.
3:20 actually came quick... and Jaxon came bouncing out all smiles to greet his gitty filled mom eager to pick him up. He had a great time! Talked all the way home and I couldn't have been more pleased with his first day of preschool experience. He'll never know how hard today was for me... but he will know how much we love to see him grow and become just who God made him to be. And, if that means continuing to let him go at different stages in life... then get me a life-time supply of Kleenex, because I'm pretty sure I'm "that" mom! One 1st day down...13 more to go! :-)


Jaxon at sneak-peak day at preschool.


Jaxon today...heading over to preschool! (yes, he did his own hair!)


The Hansen boys... dropping Jaxon off at school.

5 comments:

Jane E. said...

And just wait until they go off to college!! You will then think that sending them to preschool was easy!! I thought sending Leah to UNI (and ony 23 blocks from home) would be easy! The time goes fast - enjoy each new first and each new discovery!!

Becky Bartlett said...

Jess... I'll be 'that mom' too if it makes you feel any better. Thanks for sharing about the big day so candidly. So glad Jaxon had a great first day. I bet the car ride home was fun- his stories are so animated and great!! :)

Kris Hoskinson said...

you are such a good mom. :)

Cori (Jer's sister) said...

Jess--Even though this is Kira's
2nd year of preschool, I'll still "that mom" who walks slow to the door and isn't sure if she should actually drive away or not...I'm just hoping it's a LITTLE easier this year!! Your boys are so lucky to have their Mommy home with them and cherishing each and every moment!! I'm glad thta Jaxson had a great first day!!

Shelly said...

Ohhh...I'm going to cry for you. Ok, now look at my blog for the 'other' mom! HA!!! I can't believe how different our reactions were. Kind of makes me feel bad I wasn't baking cookies and reminiscing over the past 4 years....can't remember what I did...maybe took a nap?! Anyway, I love how much we're so different but still have so much in common! Thanks for such a good post....I'm inspired to have cookies waiting for Joelle when she gets home tomorrow:) Love, Shelly